It's nothing about you. Ookurikara only told me this morning. [He pauses, taking a breath to think this through.] And I've been reviewing and revising my plans perfectly to ensure they go off without a hitch.
You being here was a surprise we didn't anticipate. [...] We don't know exactly how long you'll be here, so why would I spoil it with that?
So it’s okay, you know? If you.... want to talk about it. I don’t know if I’ll say the right thing - but I know that he’s not always the best to talk to about what you might be feeling, even if he tries...
...I'm not letting him get executed for doing something right. If they have to eliminate corruption, taking care of me and Squall is what must be done. In the end, it'll be alright, right? Ookurikara said he'd make this as painless as possible once I was done...I'm going to take care of Squall myself. If I cause the most damage to him, they can't trace it back to Ookurikara and it'll look as though Squall and I eliminated each other.
[...] I suppose I should be grateful knowing ahead of time, shouldn't I? Not everyone is that lucky. But at the same time I'm not sure any amount of planning is going to prepare me for this.
...there's two of us that they've asked him to eliminate. So I'm taking care of everything so he doesn't get caught. [...but he folds his arms over his chest, pausing again.]
Out of everything I thought I'd ever do here, planning my own death wasn't on that list at all. [...] But if I'm scared of it, I won't go through with it. So...[A Shrug.]
Because you’re a good person, and you know that if this is really inevitable... it’s what you should do. And Ookurikara will be good to you, too. I know that when it comes down to it, you’ll do what’s right.
I know I will. [There's no choice in that matter, and his mind's made up.] ...we've talked about it. If you had lived, if we would have protected you in trial knowing you were corrupted. We both agreed it wouldn't have been fair, and I think perhaps that's why he told me as soon as he knew.
I'm nervous that Squall will throw off my plan completely, but at the same time I'm using distraction to my knowledge. I'm willing to bet he'll follow me, and with Ookurikara in the wings he can help me finish it off. And if you think about it, the numbers will add up. Two corrupted, and two killers. They may very well just believe Squall and I killed one another.
[...] I wish I didn't have to do this either, but I'd rather not make this more difficult for those left than I have to. We can't risk letting corruption exist just because I don't want to die, you know? Besides, it almost sounds like the other side is a little better.
I don’t know if I’d call it better.... Hisoka is still there, you know.
[she’ll answer that first as she goes over the rest. and she’ll just sigh, tucking her hair behind her ear and trying to fix it just a little bit more. it buys her some time so she can get her thoughts in order]
.... you’re smart, you know. Way smarter than him. If he didn’t have you involved in the plan, he would probably admit to it or do something a lot more easily traceable. You’re saving him, too.
...I want to believe you, and perhaps I will if this goes off perfectly. If I can save him for saving me, I'll be satisfied. [There's a quiet sigh then.] He's a good person, even if I don't fully understand him. I can see why the two of you get along though.
[...but back to the original point, because it's worth asking.] Hisoka's not bothering you still, is he?
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Is that the one where you and he already decided on how you’re going to die?
[look.
she’s going to stare him straight in the eye, because she gave him the chance.]
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I wasn't aware he would tell you something like that.
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Is there a reason why you and Miki don’t bother to tell me things?
If you’re still trying to process it yourself, I get it, fine -
But if it’s something about me.... you can tell me.
[if it’s something that she can do, to be a better partner for him]
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You being here was a surprise we didn't anticipate. [...] We don't know exactly how long you'll be here, so why would I spoil it with that?
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I’m here until tomorrow.
So it’s okay, you know? If you.... want to talk about it. I don’t know if I’ll say the right thing - but I know that he’s not always the best to talk to about what you might be feeling, even if he tries...
... it’s okay - if you’re nervous. Or worried.
[Or. Scared.]
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[...] I suppose I should be grateful knowing ahead of time, shouldn't I? Not everyone is that lucky. But at the same time I'm not sure any amount of planning is going to prepare me for this.
What exactly did he tell you?
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[ . . . Not that part, apparently. she looks torn for a second before she absorbs the rest]
... that he was asked to do what Miki and Four used to do - before...
[that whole weekend fucked it all up]
... even if you know, that doesn’t make it easier, right? How you feel about it.
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...there's two of us that they've asked him to eliminate. So I'm taking care of everything so he doesn't get caught. [...but he folds his arms over his chest, pausing again.]
Out of everything I thought I'd ever do here, planning my own death wasn't on that list at all. [...] But if I'm scared of it, I won't go through with it. So...[A Shrug.]
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You’ll go through with it.
[she says that much with certainty - ]
Because you’re a good person, and you know that if this is really inevitable... it’s what you should do. And Ookurikara will be good to you, too. I know that when it comes down to it, you’ll do what’s right.
... even if I wish you didn’t have to.
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I'm nervous that Squall will throw off my plan completely, but at the same time I'm using distraction to my knowledge. I'm willing to bet he'll follow me, and with Ookurikara in the wings he can help me finish it off. And if you think about it, the numbers will add up. Two corrupted, and two killers. They may very well just believe Squall and I killed one another.
[...] I wish I didn't have to do this either, but I'd rather not make this more difficult for those left than I have to. We can't risk letting corruption exist just because I don't want to die, you know? Besides, it almost sounds like the other side is a little better.
no subject
[she’ll answer that first as she goes over the rest. and she’ll just sigh, tucking her hair behind her ear and trying to fix it just a little bit more. it buys her some time so she can get her thoughts in order]
.... you’re smart, you know. Way smarter than him. If he didn’t have you involved in the plan, he would probably admit to it or do something a lot more easily traceable. You’re saving him, too.
And you know I’m grateful for that.
You really do make a difference here.
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[...but back to the original point, because it's worth asking.] Hisoka's not bothering you still, is he?