I didn't, because we didn't have anything like that - but I'm used to places cheating.
[she is still not going to look apologetic]
Maybe next time if the situation calls for it, I'll let someone stay with me, but there was something more pressing than what I was dealing with. It made sense to have Yin Yu accompany Flayn instead.
Say it even if it's not productive. I don't hold anything back so other people shouldn't either.
[and she's aware that a lot of the things she says aren't productive]
... they really wanted me to give up, if they were going to use one of the few people who I would listen to closely to say it. But it was so strange coming from his mouth. He'd never be so against me and something that I wanted to do.
That's why I think we have to keep pressing past their rules. They're scared of what we'll find.
It's fucking nothing, Lili, I was just going to say some bullshit about how I'm glad you're okay and I'm sorry shit got used against you, and I wish you'd be more careful, but you know what, I haven't been able to find Phoenix anywhere so I'm fucking losing my shit a bit and I really don't feel like hearing someone shoot me down right now, so I'm fucking staying silent.
I appreciate you saying those things to me... but your mind's obviously somewhere else, right?
[lili's favoring one leg, but she also doesn't seem to be even remotely interested in staying in one place now that she's been made aware that phoenix is missing]
Your friend is gone, so I can't ask you to keep staying here and chatting with me.
[a beat]
I know what it's like - to have someone go missing on Thursday. So let's go look for him so he can turn out to be fine and we'll both lecture him on being irresponsible on the worst day of the week.
[the truth of the matter is that no one knows what to do with lili ever, so this just feels right
but she nods along with that easily, no longer minding the silence once she seems to have a reason for it and is just going to look around]
I'll head up to the isolation cabin, you go to the check by the lake, we reconvene here and then head down to the mess hall together if we don't find anything?
[ . . . it's brief, and a little uncertain, but lili reaches out with her good arm and lets her fingertips brush against beau's arm]
You don't need to thank me for this.
Remember to breathe. We won't stop until we find him.
[and then lili will move to head off in the other direction to search on her end. it might take her a little longer to return, given her leg injury, but she will make it back eventually]
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You went off by yourself? [ she asks, looking vaguely scandalized. ] Have you tried to break in to places before?
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[she doesn't look too bothered]
I'm not defenseless or stupid, so I didn't think it would matter. It mostly didn't.
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[ she's trying not to worry too much, but. ]
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[she is still not going to look apologetic]
Maybe next time if the situation calls for it, I'll let someone stay with me, but there was something more pressing than what I was dealing with. It made sense to have Yin Yu accompany Flayn instead.
[she clearly needed it more than lili did]
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Fine. [ that's all she can think of to say that isn't going to get her in trouble. ]
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If you have something to say, say it.
It annoys me more when people think they have to hold their tongue around me.
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[ she stretches her legs out. ] Was there anything else you can remember?
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[and she's aware that a lot of the things she says aren't productive]
... they really wanted me to give up, if they were going to use one of the few people who I would listen to closely to say it. But it was so strange coming from his mouth. He'd never be so against me and something that I wanted to do.
That's why I think we have to keep pressing past their rules. They're scared of what we'll find.
no subject
as for the rest: ]
We'll keep pressing. I'll pick the cause back up tomorrow. Tonight I'm fucking tired.
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squints]
I can't trust you if you're not clear with me.
[they can drop talking about pressing, but apparently lili doesn't like noticing that people are holding back on her]
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It's fucking nothing, Lili, I was just going to say some bullshit about how I'm glad you're okay and I'm sorry shit got used against you, and I wish you'd be more careful, but you know what, I haven't been able to find Phoenix anywhere so I'm fucking losing my shit a bit and I really don't feel like hearing someone shoot me down right now, so I'm fucking staying silent.
Okay? Happy?
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No, I'm not.
[and she shifts, moving to get up - ]
Let's go keep looking then.
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[lili's favoring one leg, but she also doesn't seem to be even remotely interested in staying in one place now that she's been made aware that phoenix is missing]
Your friend is gone, so I can't ask you to keep staying here and chatting with me.
[a beat]
I know what it's like - to have someone go missing on Thursday. So let's go look for him so he can turn out to be fine and we'll both lecture him on being irresponsible on the worst day of the week.
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Uh. [ she just stares, for a second. your friend is gone, and something in her twists and aches, for a long second. ]
... Okay. [ she'll... stand up then. ]
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but she nods along with that easily, no longer minding the silence once she seems to have a reason for it and is just going to look around]
I'll head up to the isolation cabin, you go to the check by the lake, we reconvene here and then head down to the mess hall together if we don't find anything?
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her fingers flex into fists and then relax, and she just. breathes. just for a second. ]
Yeah. Yeah, okay. [ she says, quietly. and before leaving, she says, genuine: ] ... Thank you.
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You don't need to thank me for this.
Remember to breathe. We won't stop until we find him.
[and then lili will move to head off in the other direction to search on her end. it might take her a little longer to return, given her leg injury, but she will make it back eventually]