[they lost so many people this week. they've only found who was responsible for... two of them? that's potentially three other killers out there, unless someone doubled up. more if you assume they were new killers, and not the same person striking again.]
she's going to go ahead and let her hand fall on flayn's shoulder.]
... I know.
I am too.
[and normally she would say that they have to keep going, and perhaps she'll still get to that - but she also thinks... it's fair. to be tired in this moment.]
[for some reason, she thinks she has an idea, unfortunately.]
... I won't ask. [a beat] But unless you killed someone and you've been hiding that - or possibly even then, you're my friend, so don't ask me to refrain from being kind to you.
You owe me nothing, Lili. No matter what your power is or what team you are on, I trust you. So - if it helps you to be able to leverage your power and team to get others to cooperate... you do not need to tell me anything at all, no matter what week it is.
Kara, Yin Yu and Dimitri all know - so if it ever comes up that I do something during trial or I'm suspicious... if the three of you are able to collaborate against me, it would be less difficult.
Well... now that I know that, I certainly know to lend my voice to theirs should such a situation ever arise.
[she hopes it won't, though.]
...it is your choice to make, if you truly wish to tell me. But - I just want to be sure you know that you do not need to offer me anything to secure my loyalty. You already have it.
I'm going to keep doing that - but that's just because I don't think we should tolerate anything else. I'm not conflicted about the direction that I'm going.
[she nods again, but doesn't seem to know quite how to articulate it.
it's not a bad thing, she thinks, to try and be kind. in fact, it's a good thing - but what good has it done her, or any of them, so far? it hasn't brought them any closer to finding a way out of this.
not to mention - people are so kind to her, it's hard for her to imagine that any of them could hurt someone.
but there are clearly killers out there.
she can't think of a way to say that that doesn't sound needlessly depressing.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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flayn looks sort of conflicted as she takes the cup, but she accepts it.]
Hello, Lili...
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Tea not to your liking?
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[to demonstrate, she sips the tea. hopefully it isn't poisoned!]
...I thought that finding a culprit would feel at least a little better than this does.
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no jk]
... people are still going to suffer, no matter who we lose.
[a beat]
But it's alright. To be upset by that.
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[they lost so many people this week. they've only found who was responsible for... two of them? that's potentially three other killers out there, unless someone doubled up. more if you assume they were new killers, and not the same person striking again.]
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she's going to go ahead and let her hand fall on flayn's shoulder.]
... I know.
I am too.
[and normally she would say that they have to keep going, and perhaps she'll still get to that - but she also thinks... it's fair. to be tired in this moment.]
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[something about the hand on her shoulder makes her flinch, though.]
...Lili, listen. I cannot say it now, but - there is something I need to tell you next week. Please do not be too kind to me between now and then.
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she blinks at that, startled.]
.... okay.
[ . . . ]
If you lied to me - just tell me why. Next week.
[but she won't make flayn admit it now]
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...but I did do something that I think you will be very displeased with me about, once you know.
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Okay.
[for some reason, she thinks she has an idea, unfortunately.]
... I won't ask. [a beat] But unless you killed someone and you've been hiding that - or possibly even then, you're my friend, so don't ask me to refrain from being kind to you.
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Very well, but you reserve the right to be extremely cross with me once you find out what I have to say.
[she'll just feel guilty over lili being kind to her! It's Fine.]
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Probably. But I don't want to talk about it if I can't find out until Monday.
[there's no point in getting any angrier]
There's plenty of mysteries... but I'm glad that you'll at least give me an answer to one.
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...I keep secrets when I have to, but I am looking forward to not keeping this one a secret from you any longer.
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Yeah. I get that.
I was thinking about how I owe you my power and team but... all my chances to disclose were already eaten up for next week. So...
We'll both have to make it to the week after, so I can tell you then.
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You owe me nothing, Lili. No matter what your power is or what team you are on, I trust you. So - if it helps you to be able to leverage your power and team to get others to cooperate... you do not need to tell me anything at all, no matter what week it is.
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I just want to, I guess.
[she shakes her head]
Kara, Yin Yu and Dimitri all know - so if it ever comes up that I do something during trial or I'm suspicious... if the three of you are able to collaborate against me, it would be less difficult.
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[she hopes it won't, though.]
...it is your choice to make, if you truly wish to tell me. But - I just want to be sure you know that you do not need to offer me anything to secure my loyalty. You already have it.
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and it makes lili pause as she looks down at her own mug of tea.]
.... I don't know if I deserve that, though.
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[she also looks down at her tea.]
You have spent the entire time we are here rallying the rest of us to find a way out.
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I'm going to keep doing that - but that's just because I don't think we should tolerate anything else. I'm not conflicted about the direction that I'm going.
Just...
[a sigh.]
Just the methods.
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[she nods]
I can certainly understand that.
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Can you?
[flayn is so kind, to so many people. it would confuse her deeply to think that she would be feeling unsure about that.]
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it's not a bad thing, she thinks, to try and be kind. in fact, it's a good thing - but what good has it done her, or any of them, so far? it hasn't brought them any closer to finding a way out of this.
not to mention - people are so kind to her, it's hard for her to imagine that any of them could hurt someone.
but there are clearly killers out there.
she can't think of a way to say that that doesn't sound needlessly depressing.]
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she's fine with the silence, but she can't help her worry at the look on flayn's face.]
... you can tell me.
Even if it doesn't sound how you want it to at first -
You can tell me. I'm not good with words either.
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[she sighs heavily]
I have been trying to trust everyone here. I want to be able to trust everyone more than anything.
...but it only hurts more when you find out someone you wanted to believe in did something... awful. And everyone who is left...
[well.
pretty much everyone who is left is someone she's at least not unfriendly with. it's terrifying, but saying it this way - it feels selfish.]