[ some regions of faerghus have less frost than others, and they've worked on technological advancements and sorcery in lieu of a strong agricultural system, but lack of food is a basic failing of any kingdom...
is what he would say, but they have a task to get to. ]
Ah, right. Apologies, it's not like me to get so distracted.
[ it's just really exciting to talk about this stupid nonsense? ]
Was there one you were interested in particular? I was thinking we could share secrets, perhaps... [ he trusts lili, so. ]
You don't need to say sorry - we'll pick up the topic again later.
[UNFORTUNATELY, SHE IS JUST AS HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT STUPID NONSENSE. but when she hears that dimitri wants to share secrets... she looks a little flustered but only because - ]
... that's fine, I'd just - have to ask you to go first. Off the top of my head, I can't think of any secrets I keep from you...
[ it's easier to talk about all the nonsense. dimitri is honest to a fault, too, which makes this particular challenge difficult. because the only secrets he has are political, which will mean nothing to her, or unpleasant things he keeps to himself.
so he picks one of the latter, but a mild one. it's almost funny? ]
Um...
[ at least the longer he takes, the more time it gives lili to come up with something too. after a moment, he skewers a raspberry for himself. ]
Well for one, I don't know what this is. Also, I could not tell you how it tastes.
[ why does fire emblem have stuff like fantasy fruits. is it necessary. must i seriously suffer through the 'what is this mundane thing' every single thread. ]
Mm... no... I just can't taste anything. It makes eating a bit of a chore, if I'm honest.
[ but at least he's not picky. he chews on the raspberry for a moment, concluding that the texture's a little weird. ]
I would feel bad telling Ookurikara, since he works so hard at our food. And I do deeply appreciate it either way. But it's probably best that you know... [ so she doesn't take it personally that he doesn't gorge himself on certain dinosaur cookies. ]
[ . . . oh. her expression softens at that, though there's definitely an obvious tinge of worry. she's bad at hiding anything, whether it be secrets or her own emotions.]
... I didn't realize. [a beat] Kara makes food because it's what his former master used to do - to strengthen bonds with people and put food in their stomachs. Even if you can't taste it... I think he'd still put in the effort.
[because her sword is very stupid, but he is also very sweet and thoughtful for the people he's decided to care for.]
Are there any foods you like more than others? Even if not for taste....
[ he smiles at that, a little slanted—that sounds like something ashe would do, but comparing the two of them feels very silly. still, it speaks to kara's character. he's kinder than he acts. ]
...Ookurikara is a good man.
[ he sips his cider thoughtfully. ]
I think the effort is enough. Food that's made especially for you—even if the flavor isn't there, it tastes better, doesn't it? [ he thinks that's true of anyone, not just him. ] But if I had to speak to preference... I used to like sweets. [ so he pretends he does still, mostly. ] Nowadays I like warm, hearty foods. And creamy or silken textures. [ cheese. ] But mostly I just like eating alongside others, so you and Ookurikara are good company.
[ . . . hm. there's a soft, gently amused huff - and she'll go ahead and help herself to another raspberry as she thinks of what to say for a moment. the first thing that comes to mind:]
Okay, I'll tell him. So... we'll try to prepare more foods like that. [cheese.]
... and for the rest of the time we have here, we'll share as many meals we can. [ . . . ] I'll keep your secret. So... thanks for telling me. You should say more things like that - if there's ways to make you happier.
[even if it's just preparing foods that are more agreeable with him]
[ things that make him happy... is it weird that he hasn't really considered it? he likes eating meals with them... he hadn't thought that going to sleep surrounded by other people would be pleasant either, but it has been, even if lili falls off mid-conversation to pass out, and he can't tell how long ago kara went to bed because he didn't say anything to begin with.
it makes him happy that she would consider his preferences, so that's something. ]
Ah, you needn't trouble yourselves... [ ... ] but I appreciate it.
[ it's not just lip service—it does mean a lot to him, small gesture or not. but is that... really what he'd come to tell her? was that so important to pull her aside for?
[ . . . . . . . hm. she looks thoughtful at this and it's - well, it's not really a secret, she thinks? because it's a truth that she intends to reveal eventually, but she supposes that for the moment it's concealed so... it'd count?]
.... I ask that you don't tell Kara this - because I'll tell him myself, once we're away from this place. I don't like hiding things from him, and it's not like I'm going out of my way to keep it from him but... it'd just make him unhappier to consider.
[ . . . . hm! she's going to take another sip of her cider as she looks away.]
.... About a week ago, Akira said - ... well, in essence, he has feelings for me. They're not particularly strong, and he's involved with someone else, and he has no intention to act on them. But... we did end up talking about it. We agreed that nothing will change anyway - but Kara dislikes Akira so much... It'd just pull from our time together if I mentioned it to him.
[ . . . . ]
And I mentioned to Kara earlier in this week - ah, wait. Before that... after we were all cursed, Ash had said... he might still be willing to consider - dating? Like modern courtship... but Kara said he didn't want to until we were certain that we weren't rushing into it because of a curse. So I gave it a week... but the fact that I remembered that Ash said that at all -
It was odd to me... so I brought it up with Kara on Monday. And he'd said - that he would rather have me to himself for a while longer - even if not forever, since we both know I'll have to marry someone else. Of course his happiness means the most to me, so I'll do whatever leaves him most at ease.
But... well, I did talk to Ash later and the topic came up on its own - [right in this very lounge, now that she thinks about it] - and I didn't anticipate him to respond.... He's understanding, but I suppose I was startled when he said that he would've been willing to engage in a relationship to begin with.
[ . . . . . . . . lord above this does sound complicated, doesn't it? she sighs and just eats another raspberry.]
Mm. Hearing it all at once is actually strangely complicated, isn't it...?
[yikes!]
Not that it matters - since I'll probably end up in a political marriage anyway. It feels rather disingenuous of me to even be engaging in this much, doesn't it...
dimitri listens along even though he is profoundly out of his element. this is... a lot? he's not surprised lili managed to tangle herself up in all this, but he's equally impressed that they're all having these discussions. wow. ]
I... am not really an expert on such things. It does sound complicated.
[ he barely knows what dating is. so he can't really comment on the intricacies or anything, but when it comes to feelings... ]
But all-in-all, I don't think you're capable of being disingenuous, Lili. As you've told me before, the heart longs after whatever it wants. Such things are well outside of our control.
[ if she cares for that many people sincerely, how is it disingenuous? besides, she's been honest with them, it seems. ]
If anything, I'm glad for you. When I saw Flayn in love with Shadows, I knew it wasn't real... but she just looked so happy. I loved knowing that such a thing was possible.
[ it was nice. even if it was fake—the emotion was real, wasn't it? it's not so bad, seeing his friends cared for and cherished, and doing the same for others. even if she may not be with all of them, even if she has to make choices. for now, she's staying with kara alone, but he realizes that she may have to face a marriage someday. ]
I know that people in positions like ours may need to marry for the sake of power or politics, but... that scarcely matters in the present, does it? I'm sorry I don't have much advice on how to resolve it, but know that I'm happy that you are so well-loved.
[ no matter what she ends up doing, regardless of who she's with, he hopes she finds happiness. ]
[ . . . . she startles a bit - and clearly flusters at the word 'well-loved'.]
I.... I think you're exaggerating a bit! I'm rather sure it isn't anything quite so strong as love, so we shouldn't just be throwing that word around...!
[only kara loves her. the rest are passing infatuations - and if they aren't acted upon, they'll probably disappear? lili's never had that much luck, given her own tendency to cling onto unrequited romance, but she's pretty sure it'd be the case for the other two.]
And nothing really needs to be resolved - I'm happy as I am. I just need to tell Kara.... [even saying 'don't tell kara' has actually sent her on a bit of a spiral, and then i had to ask ray for a pc for thursday bc lili will probably be consumed with guilt if she doesn't tell him sooner rather than later. wow!] Unrequited feelings and things that aren't meant to be... those exist too.
I think romance can be sweet, I just also think... knowing what lies ahead for people like us - and knowing that I already have Kara....
[it feels greedy to want for more. but dimitri would've felt that, when they shared emotions. the way that lili is so used to never having, that she takes so forcefully. she is always wanting. it's just that when it comes to love - kara is the only thing in her life that's always already been good enough.]
[she downs the rest of her glass and then goes to refill it, huffing irritably.]
It just doesn't feel right!
And it's infuriating to think that I'll probably end up in a marriage with someone I can barely tolerate! Why couldn't I just get a chance to marry someone like you?! It'd make everything simpler!
[wow is it warm? she needs to examine what they're drinking.]
[ dimitri doesn't experience things like 'feelings' in fractions—so it looks like love, to him? why deny it? lili is just in love with like three people, kara most of all, it's fine.
he listens though, because it's true that in the circles of nobility, one-sided feelings and dalliances are common; he's seen it in plenty of his classmates, those looking to woo a future spouse. it's all familiar woes. indeed, in some regards, if he had someone capable to marry, that would make his life easier too—
[ ...he processes this. sips his cider. it tastes, predictably, like nothing. she is probably speaking broadly—of course she would rather marry a friend than some high-minded noble she doesn't know, tethered to a political web rather than genuine feelings.
she can't be talking about him, specifically. it's a good thing he figured this out, before things got awkward? ]
Um. It's nothing.
[ ...it's nothing. ]
I understand what you mean, is all. [ they know each other's woes too well, don't they? ] If I could marry someone like you, I'd consider myself lucky, too.
[ that's sincere, unfortunately. he knows no other way to be. ]
[there's just a bit of a huff at that - disbelieving.]
I just explained my situation to you, and you'd still say something like that? You don't need to say things like that to make me feel better or make things even, Dimitri.
[she is aware she is a mess, and she also shakes her head.]
You'd deserve someone far better suited to ruling alongside you.
[dimitri is kind but he also needs therapy has many burdens. lili is still too clumsy to be able to confidently say she could support him, no matter how she tries.]
... no. Whoever gets to be your queen - or consort [gotta leave room for gay] - would be lucky.
[ he looks a little surprised by that, brows furrowed as he frowns and shakes his head. where is she getting this from? ]
I'm not saying it out of pity.
[ when has he ever been so dishonest? hopefully, she'll trust what he has to say. ]
I truly mean it, Lili. You have the drive, cleverness, and resourcefulness to make a wonderful ruler—people have already shown their willingness to stand by you and put their futures in your hands. [ which he doesn't necessarily envy her for—he's seen the pressure it puts on her firsthand. ] But for me... I think I would have to find someone who puts their heart and thoughts with their people first. And that was one of the first things you ever showed me.
[ so of course she will make a tremendous queen, or noble, or whatever her title is. regardless of who she marries, he has no doubts she will make the most if it. ]
she's startled at that - and obviously touched by it. even after everything, she never expects anyone to say a kind word to her, even though she knows dimitri himself is kind. and it's not even just... generically nice. it speaks to everything that she hopes to be. useful, capable, someone who can make a difference to help their people. it makes her face heat up as she looks away, trying to buy her time by obviously and awkwardly sipping her drink.
until it's
gone.]
... well! [SHE CLEARS HER THROAT AND DOESN'T LOOK AT HIM]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
is what he would say, but they have a task to get to. ]
Ah, right. Apologies, it's not like me to get so distracted.
[ it's just really exciting to talk about this stupid nonsense? ]
Was there one you were interested in particular? I was thinking we could share secrets, perhaps... [ he trusts lili, so. ]
no subject
You don't need to say sorry - we'll pick up the topic again later.
[UNFORTUNATELY, SHE IS JUST AS HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT STUPID NONSENSE. but when she hears that dimitri wants to share secrets... she looks a little flustered but only because - ]
... that's fine, I'd just - have to ask you to go first. Off the top of my head, I can't think of any secrets I keep from you...
[she's. just. not the type.]
no subject
so he picks one of the latter, but a mild one. it's almost funny? ]
Um...
[ at least the longer he takes, the more time it gives lili to come up with something too. after a moment, he skewers a raspberry for himself. ]
Well for one, I don't know what this is. Also, I could not tell you how it tastes.
no subject
It's a raspberry - but you don't know how it tastes...?
Do you have trouble putting words to it? Or...
[if this is his secret, she doubts it's something that mundane.]
no subject
Mm... no... I just can't taste anything. It makes eating a bit of a chore, if I'm honest.
[ but at least he's not picky. he chews on the raspberry for a moment, concluding that the texture's a little weird. ]
I would feel bad telling Ookurikara, since he works so hard at our food. And I do deeply appreciate it either way. But it's probably best that you know... [ so she doesn't take it personally that he doesn't gorge himself on certain dinosaur cookies. ]
no subject
... I didn't realize. [a beat] Kara makes food because it's what his former master used to do - to strengthen bonds with people and put food in their stomachs. Even if you can't taste it... I think he'd still put in the effort.
[because her sword is very stupid, but he is also very sweet and thoughtful for the people he's decided to care for.]
Are there any foods you like more than others? Even if not for taste....
[say cheese, white boy]
no subject
...Ookurikara is a good man.
[ he sips his cider thoughtfully. ]
I think the effort is enough. Food that's made especially for you—even if the flavor isn't there, it tastes better, doesn't it? [ he thinks that's true of anyone, not just him. ] But if I had to speak to preference... I used to like sweets. [ so he pretends he does still, mostly. ] Nowadays I like warm, hearty foods. And creamy or silken textures. [ cheese. ] But mostly I just like eating alongside others, so you and Ookurikara are good company.
no subject
Okay, I'll tell him. So... we'll try to prepare more foods like that. [cheese.]
... and for the rest of the time we have here, we'll share as many meals we can. [ . . . ] I'll keep your secret. So... thanks for telling me. You should say more things like that - if there's ways to make you happier.
[even if it's just preparing foods that are more agreeable with him]
no subject
it makes him happy that she would consider his preferences, so that's something. ]
Ah, you needn't trouble yourselves... [ ... ] but I appreciate it.
[ it's not just lip service—it does mean a lot to him, small gesture or not. but is that... really what he'd come to tell her? was that so important to pull her aside for?
...well, in any case. ]
I think that makes it your turn.
no subject
.... I ask that you don't tell Kara this - because I'll tell him myself, once we're away from this place. I don't like hiding things from him, and it's not like I'm going out of my way to keep it from him but... it'd just make him unhappier to consider.
[ . . . . hm! she's going to take another sip of her cider as she looks away.]
.... About a week ago, Akira said - ... well, in essence, he has feelings for me. They're not particularly strong, and he's involved with someone else, and he has no intention to act on them. But... we did end up talking about it. We agreed that nothing will change anyway - but Kara dislikes Akira so much... It'd just pull from our time together if I mentioned it to him.
[ . . . . ]
And I mentioned to Kara earlier in this week - ah, wait. Before that... after we were all cursed, Ash had said... he might still be willing to consider - dating? Like modern courtship... but Kara said he didn't want to until we were certain that we weren't rushing into it because of a curse. So I gave it a week... but the fact that I remembered that Ash said that at all -
It was odd to me... so I brought it up with Kara on Monday. And he'd said - that he would rather have me to himself for a while longer - even if not forever, since we both know I'll have to marry someone else. Of course his happiness means the most to me, so I'll do whatever leaves him most at ease.
But... well, I did talk to Ash later and the topic came up on its own - [right in this very lounge, now that she thinks about it] - and I didn't anticipate him to respond.... He's understanding, but I suppose I was startled when he said that he would've been willing to engage in a relationship to begin with.
[ . . . . . . . . lord above this does sound complicated, doesn't it? she sighs and just eats another raspberry.]
Mm. Hearing it all at once is actually strangely complicated, isn't it...?
[yikes!]
Not that it matters - since I'll probably end up in a political marriage anyway. It feels rather disingenuous of me to even be engaging in this much, doesn't it...
no subject
dimitri listens along even though he is profoundly out of his element. this is... a lot? he's not surprised lili managed to tangle herself up in all this, but he's equally impressed that they're all having these discussions. wow. ]
I... am not really an expert on such things. It does sound complicated.
[ he barely knows what dating is. so he can't really comment on the intricacies or anything, but when it comes to feelings... ]
But all-in-all, I don't think you're capable of being disingenuous, Lili. As you've told me before, the heart longs after whatever it wants. Such things are well outside of our control.
[ if she cares for that many people sincerely, how is it disingenuous? besides, she's been honest with them, it seems. ]
If anything, I'm glad for you. When I saw Flayn in love with Shadows, I knew it wasn't real... but she just looked so happy. I loved knowing that such a thing was possible.
[ it was nice. even if it was fake—the emotion was real, wasn't it? it's not so bad, seeing his friends cared for and cherished, and doing the same for others. even if she may not be with all of them, even if she has to make choices. for now, she's staying with kara alone, but he realizes that she may have to face a marriage someday. ]
I know that people in positions like ours may need to marry for the sake of power or politics, but... that scarcely matters in the present, does it? I'm sorry I don't have much advice on how to resolve it, but know that I'm happy that you are so well-loved.
[ no matter what she ends up doing, regardless of who she's with, he hopes she finds happiness. ]
[1/2]
I.... I think you're exaggerating a bit! I'm rather sure it isn't anything quite so strong as love, so we shouldn't just be throwing that word around...!
[only kara loves her. the rest are passing infatuations - and if they aren't acted upon, they'll probably disappear? lili's never had that much luck, given her own tendency to cling onto unrequited romance, but she's pretty sure it'd be the case for the other two.]
And nothing really needs to be resolved - I'm happy as I am. I just need to tell Kara.... [even saying 'don't tell kara' has actually sent her on a bit of a spiral, and then i had to ask ray for a pc for thursday bc lili will probably be consumed with guilt if she doesn't tell him sooner rather than later. wow!] Unrequited feelings and things that aren't meant to be... those exist too.
I think romance can be sweet, I just also think... knowing what lies ahead for people like us - and knowing that I already have Kara....
[it feels greedy to want for more. but dimitri would've felt that, when they shared emotions. the way that lili is so used to never having, that she takes so forcefully. she is always wanting. it's just that when it comes to love - kara is the only thing in her life that's always already been good enough.]
no subject
It just doesn't feel right!
And it's infuriating to think that I'll probably end up in a marriage with someone I can barely tolerate! Why couldn't I just get a chance to marry someone like you?! It'd make everything simpler!
[wow is it warm? she needs to examine what they're drinking.]
no subject
he listens though, because it's true that in the circles of nobility, one-sided feelings and dalliances are common; he's seen it in plenty of his classmates, those looking to woo a future spouse. it's all familiar woes. indeed, in some regards, if he had someone capable to marry, that would make his life easier too—
wait. what? ]
What?
[ ?????? ]
no subject
What?
no subject
she can't be talking about him, specifically. it's a good thing he figured this out, before things got awkward? ]
Um. It's nothing.
[ ...it's nothing. ]
I understand what you mean, is all. [ they know each other's woes too well, don't they? ] If I could marry someone like you, I'd consider myself lucky, too.
[ that's sincere, unfortunately. he knows no other way to be. ]
no subject
I just explained my situation to you, and you'd still say something like that? You don't need to say things like that to make me feel better or make things even, Dimitri.
[she is aware she is a mess, and she also shakes her head.]
You'd deserve someone far better suited to ruling alongside you.
[dimitri is kind but he also
needs therapyhas many burdens. lili is still too clumsy to be able to confidently say she could support him, no matter how she tries.]... no. Whoever gets to be your queen - or consort [gotta leave room for gay] - would be lucky.
no subject
I'm not saying it out of pity.
[ when has he ever been so dishonest? hopefully, she'll trust what he has to say. ]
I truly mean it, Lili. You have the drive, cleverness, and resourcefulness to make a wonderful ruler—people have already shown their willingness to stand by you and put their futures in your hands. [ which he doesn't necessarily envy her for—he's seen the pressure it puts on her firsthand. ] But for me... I think I would have to find someone who puts their heart and thoughts with their people first. And that was one of the first things you ever showed me.
[ so of course she will make a tremendous queen, or noble, or whatever her title is. regardless of who she marries, he has no doubts she will make the most if it. ]
no subject
embarrassing.
she's startled at that - and obviously touched by it. even after everything, she never expects anyone to say a kind word to her, even though she knows dimitri himself is kind. and it's not even just... generically nice. it speaks to everything that she hopes to be. useful, capable, someone who can make a difference to help their people. it makes her face heat up as she looks away, trying to buy her time by obviously and awkwardly sipping her drink.
until it's
gone.]
... well! [SHE CLEARS HER THROAT AND DOESN'T LOOK AT HIM]
I'm sure you'll find someone!
[because it's not! like! he'd actually want her!]