coastal | voicemail.

[Oh.

Admittedly Lili was in the middle of trying to figure out how to... leave.... The familiar voice manages to get her to turn to him rather immediately because she'd very much like not to be left wandering around this place alone anymore--

And then she realizes she's too eager to see him and schools her expression back into something a little bit more reserved. Yeah.

That said, she frowns a bit more at his question -- and lifts the mask in her hand as a response.]

What do you think?

[HE SEES THAT.

But he doesn't make a comment on it (for now) because his attention is drawn down to the mask in her hand right away.]

How many of these creepy things does that lady have?! [WHY.] Geez... I'm guessing you have the same problems with yours? I've tried everything to get rid of it but it keeps coming back.

[please don't comment on it ever.

But she's just going to shudder at the question, an aggravated huff leaving her lips way too easily. IS IT TIME TO SHITTALK? IT'S TIME TO SHITTALK.]

It even attached itself to my face while I was walking -- that's dangerous! Truly, do the people here have absolutely zero regard for our safety?

[Guess the stampede hasn't happened yet so.]

[No promises...

HE'S READY FOR SHITTALKING, THOUGH. He's always ready, big fat gossip that he is.]

Right? I mean, the answer to that is obviously a big fat "no", but still! ...I don't think they've ever really tried to pretend they care about that stuff, though. Not counting the whole "ooh, you guys are the big heroes!" thing they do sometimes.

[But he waves his non-mask carrying hand dismissively at that, since he's under the impression that no one believes that by now.]

[Admittedly Lili hasn't been around long enough to really gather personal opinion on CERES -- for some reason accumulating wealth and training did take priority so that she didn't absolutely wilt under the weight of her own uselessness -- but that still manages to get her to scoff.]

Then that makes them the absolute worst....!!

Perhaps they solved the issue by giving people access to small luxuries, but if they're then turning their backs on them over the simplest of safety measures, that's unacceptable!

[HUFF HUFF HUFF she might stomp her foot]

[Now is indeed a good foot-stomping time, he'd probably join her if he was feeling a little more huffy.

But tragically he's more or less used to CERES and their weird shit, so he's not quite as riled as he would be if he was newer. Not to say he doesn't have any irritation to spare, though...]

Yeah, this place is actually pretty nice to live in when they're not, y'know. [GESTURES AROUND.] Pulling stuff like this. Which they do a lot. I guess it can be kinda hard to remember day-to-day that they're gigantic jerks, though. That's probably why they kinda try not to meddle, too.

[The less their faces are everywhere, the less people focus on them or something?! He's pretty sure that's a war tactic...]

[Augh... She's shaking her head though, because this is something that manages to get under her skin personally. She hates encountering people who are in charge but don't manage to actually fulfill their responsibilities at rulers. It manages to remind her all too much of her father.]

I hadn't realize that it was such a problem.... People could get hurt from this. [not realizing that she could join that number.... ah Lili.] Being able to turn a blind eye to that sort of thing -- they must be truly despicable.

Mmm, I'm not entirely sure if it's really just turning a blind eye, either. I mean, if these things keep happening and keep happening, then they're either super uncaring or it's something else, right?

[Like an intentional avoidance of fixing the things that put them at risk.

...Though he's also certain that at least some of it is just them Not Caring™, which is still rude and frankly unacceptable when people are getting seriously injured and traumatized.]

It doesn't sit right.

[ . . . . augh.]

It doesn't.

I had thought that a governing body that turned a blind eye to situations would be the worst possible thing.... but I suppose one that goes out of its way to be malicious toward its own people even more unforgivable.

[It gets her to calm down a moment and she spares a glance to the mask again before setting her shoulders.]

Kashuu.... [A rare moment where she'll address him by name - and a small part of her wonders if he notices.] I can't let them get away with this.

[It's practically personal.]

That's what I think.

[That it's unforgivable, anyway... Even if he feels like he's not doing as much as he could be doing to fight against them all the same, which settles in the back of his mind uncomfortably.]

Mm— [But wait a second...] You aren't planning on doing anything without, like. I dunno, being super prepared, right? I get it- [Get the sentiment of not wanting them to get away with things, but--] -but these guys are totally on another level.

[ . . . ah. It's a good question but--

He's asking her that because she's weak and reckless, isn't he? Just like when her father would tell her to go calm down in her room for a week.... There's a distinctly uncomfortable expression on her face before she shakes her head firmly at that. She raises her head to meet Kashuu's gaze evenly.]

I know better than to involve other people into my messes if that's what you're asking.

[This last time... she nearly got people killed because of her - some people did die.]

Don't concern yourself with it. I don't know what I can do.... but that doesn't mean that I can just sit around!

[She's always been a little danger prone.]

[In response to that, his expression screws up a little in something akin to mild confusion.]

I know you wouldn't. [Because he's a little too trusting in the general goodness and sensibility of others, well-intentioned though it is. Lili is a good person, so of course she wouldn't put other people into situations where they might struggle.

But, more importantly (as far as he's concerned, anyway):]

I'm worried about you. There's nothing wrong with wanting to help out! Sitting around waiting for stuff to happen is really the worst. But I mean, we can't just attack 'em without a plan either, get it? It's probably gonna be a reaaally long process. I'm no good at strategy so I have to wait a lot too, but sometimes that's just unavoidable. Better than making a bad plan fast and having it blow up, right?

["I'm worried about you."

She blinks and can't help the confusion that crosses her face, brows knitting together even as her face heats up a bit because that's -- that's a really genuine thing to say?! (And she's a little mad. Why can't she say things like that?) Still though it's not enough to settle her as she frowns after and her fingers tighten around the mask in her hand, the other clenching into a fist as she hates how powerless she feels.]

You... You don't need to concern yourself with me!

[Please don't - she hates involving people.]

I know that I'm weak and that I can't do anything.... you don't have to rub it in, you know! [Ah. That's not exactly what he was saying, though.] I'll get stronger and learn more about this world and then.....

[She trails off..... because she doesn't have an answer. And then what? It's a delicate situation and she.... hasn't thought it all the way through.]

It has to get better.

[She sure is-- surprisingly self-deprecatory, for someone who thinks highly enough of themselves to offer to be a model without being asked first, huh. It's familiar in the worst way.

So there are a lot of things in here that he could address, and address quite closely at that - that she can do the things she works at, that weakness can be rectified and that it isn't always a bad thing in the first place, that he practically has to concern himself with her now because he's helped her out of the swamp and they're supposed to go to the aquarium soon. Instead, his reply is brief and simple.]

Yeah, it does. But it's not gonna get better if people are reckless.

[Which is what he's worried about more than any perceived weakness or strength or lack of knowledge or desire to learn.]

If you wanna do something about it, you can work with me and my comrades, okay? We're all heading toward the same goal, anyway. The more of us working together, the better our chances are. [When people run off by themselves, that's when Bad Things happen.

He's also a massive hypocrite, though.]

[Well, it's an offer.

It's an offer to work with Kashuu and the other swords - who are also undoubtedly strong, she's sure. For half a second, she lets herself consider it. It's not like they'd be untrustworthy, not if they're friends with someone like Kashuu or as kind as Mutsu or as loyal as Kousetsu. And perhaps there will be even more people that she hasn't met yet -- but if Kashuu is vouching for them, then they'll probably be fine too.

But isn't this just how like Yona and the others offered to help her recently? Then in her own carelessness, she managed to get both herself and Yona in more trouble... and then troubled the rest of them with having to save them.

So despite the hope in her eyes, she just gives one answer:]

No.

[She doesn't want to work with people.

Not until she can stand next to them without being a liability -- until then, they're better off separate before she causes more trouble.]

[Unfortunately, with someone as stubborn as Kashuu, an answer like that certainly isn't enough. It wouldn't be enough even if it was more substantial, honestly - because he's worried, so that means he's locked on and he won't let go.]

Just "no"?

[While he can ballpark some reasons, he doesn't actually want to hazard a direct guess in case he's way off the mark. But that means he'd need her to fill in the blanks here, and he already knows Lili is awful at explaining herself or saying what she means.]

[Just no.

She can't meet his eyes though so she glances elsewhere and her shoulders fall a bit -- no longer in the rigid line of determination but almost a little bit... sad. Wouldn't it be nice to work with people again? But then she thinks back to the list of people who have fallen just for the sake of protecting her.

Her hands come up to her chest as the idea of Kashuu getting injured crosses her mind--

And she immediately dispels it. No, she can't let that happen.]

No.

I... I will fight in my own way -- however and whenever I can. [Her voice started uncertain at first - but eventually her backbones resurfaces as she continues with more certainty.] But I can't have others trying to take care of me at the same time. I don't want that anymore.

[He's quiet for a second, considering what she says - and it does align with what he knows of Lili so far. She sought out lessons in swordsmanship to better herself. If something bothers her, he has no doubt that she'd call it out. He already knows she's troubled by the fact that she views herself as weak, but all the same, something about this is different. There's no terseness in the air to indicate she's irritated at being treated delicately, or that she's angry over the idea of being "taken care of".

So if it's not that...]

It's something else, right?

[His head cants to the side, and he's clearly forgotten about the creepyass haunted mask since he very nearly sets his hands on his hips. ...He's a sword, so he's not very good at handling these things tactfully. Emotions are still a complicated mess to him; that's why he doesn't intend to press the subject very far. He always trips up in this arena.]

Well, it's not like I'm gonna force you to join us or anything. I'm just saying you need to be super careful, that's all.

[Meanwhile Lili feels her emotions a little too much, flinching a bit at the question. Is it... something else? Well. It's something that she.... doesn't know how to say and she's not sure if she'll ever be able to learn how to say it.

Except he'd said it just earlier--

"I'm worried about you."

She opens her mouth and tries to find the words, hoping that maybe they'll tumble out and....

A soft shake of her head.]

It's not the first time I've faced difficult odds. [And she likes to think she's learned her lesson from things like this before.] I... should be fine. Don't waste your time worrying about me.

[Hopefully Lili doesn't treasure her personal space too much, because she's about to discover one of Kashuu's dumb quirks: getting up in people's bubbles when he's feeling particularly emotional. That phrasing - he understands what she means, but it absolutely doesn't sit well with him, so he's stepping right on up and reaching out to...

place a finger directly on the center of her forehead.]

Bad way to say it! That's no good at all. I don't waste my time on anything, y'know? So if I do something, it's not a waste! And that's that.

[So!! He'll worry about Lili if he wants! And it won't be a waste of time, or of worry, or of anything else! It'll probably be a waste of Lili's sanity if he ever does something stupid because he thinks she's in trouble, but that's just the life of people who befriend swords in general.]

So! You can do whatever you wanna do, but if you start talking about yourself like that again or do anything dumb just 'cause you don't wanna be a bother or whatever, I'm gonna have to beat some sense into you. [That's no way to talk to a lady buT HE DOESN'T CARE they're all fellow warriors here, clearly.]

Ah--

[She flinches a little bit because she actually does enjoy her personal space a bit.... but she's less opposed to invasions of it from people that she trusts and for one reason or another, Kashuu is one of those people. Still though it's just getting a blush to rise on her cheeks before she reaches up to gently brush away his hand with the back of her hand.

A short huff.]

Don't talk to me like that....! I'm not one of your hefty, brutish friends.

[BEATING SENSE INTO HER??? C'MON, KASHUU.]

[THAT'S HOW IT WORKS IN THIS DOJO--

The dojo is everywhere they go, by the way. It's symbolic.

He'll allow her to brush his hand away though, and he even leans back a little, settling his mask-free hand against his hip just for emphasis.]

Sometimes that's the only way you can deal with people! [Or swords. Mostly swords. Swords and ye olde sword wielders...] Especially if you're dealing with the super stubborn ones. Words aren't always enough, right?

[Spoken like someone who solves half of his serious problems by fighting.]

I can't disagree with that....

[Lili can recognize that she has a habit of getting... physical..... slamming her fist into walls and things in order to command attention.

What a delicate flower.

But still she's just going to flip her hair over her shoulder and huff, setting both of her hands on her hips as well. Two can play at that posturing game!!]

But it's not the same! Don't talk to me like that. We're not going to fight.

[She doesn't even like thinking of it....?!]

["Delicate flower". The only thing delicate about her is her grasp on how to handle things without them exploding or going pear-shaped...]

Eh? So if I asked you to be my sparring partner, you'd turn me down? No fun, no fun.

[Good thing he isn't Yamato, at least?! Who would definitely both A) try to get her to spar for real and then B) not hold back at all because he's a damn maniac.]

[ . . . . well. She sighs faintly at that.]

Whenever I get better, if you really want -- but sparring is different from saying that you'll beat people up. Really.... it's so obvious that you're a sword sometimes!

[What.

Lili that doesn't even make sense.

You just made that up.]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

one day this cr will kill me, i can already feel it in my bones

it's already killing me i'll see you in hell i guess

ugh puts on my traveling hat and descends

packs bags and jumps down the rabbit hole

whispers how could this happen to us

we've made our mistakes....

we've made our many, many mistakes....

and now we're on the highway to hell

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject